I kind of look like a deer? in headlights in this blogs featured ?image. Thinking ?back to when my life felt empty… On the outside I rocked a “Good Vibe Tribe” ? but on the inside, I lose all motor ??♀️??♀️??skills…
You ever have feelings of worry, anxiety, or fear that are strong enough to interfere with your daily activities⁉️
That was me??♀️ every day!
?Have you ever felt stuck and can’t get out of your head?⁉️
That was me ??♀️every day!
Caught in the middle of many things going?good but it all felt bad ?❗
That was me ??♀️every day!
Most people around me would say ?”Jesus take the wheel.” I took hold of my own wheel and drove! This is what that drive was like…
I have ?⚕️Generalized Anxiety Disorder
I’m 30… 31 in September I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) in my early 20s. I sought out help many times from family but they mostly ignored the cause and tried to pray my diagnosis away.
My closest friends did not know, my family did not know but I realized I was spiraling out of control. Stuck, stressed, and making one bad decision after another so I went to a professional. I was away in college at the time and the school offered free resources.
I took advantage and meeting with a trained professional who didn’t know I was on scholarships, that I was a honors student, owned my own car, had a fun social circle was great. Because despite having all those things I felt empty and alone. That’s when I learned I had GAD but It was not going to have me. Truth is I wanted so bad for it to not be true I got a second and third opinion.
The Evolution? of my GAD
It was clear jumping from relationship to relationship could not hide the pain or fix my brokenness. The pain spring from a number of things like having an absentee father. However worse than not having a consistent male role model is being abused by the males that were in your life.
From the age 6 until 9 I was sexually abused by a family member. Then at 12 and 13 a close family friend. People I should have been able to trust took advantage of my innocence and robbed me of my childhood. Basically forced me to grow up faster than I should have.
When I was 14 and 16 I tried to kill myself the pain of my past was too real. My family brushed it off said I would be okay. I was too smart to really be suicidal. Because on the surface, I was resilient I was a fighter. Underneath the smile, I was a risk, hurting and just wanted to be loved and held.
My loneliness led to one reckless decision after another. So, here I am beautiful smart, physically fit with curves in all the right places but I was in and out of emotionally and physically abusive relationships. Even worse, and I hate to admit I was self-medicating by being promiscuous.
Forget the ?Science:
Let’s just focus ?on the Stigma
My Mental Health evolution is not an isolated situation. There is science behind it and its happening to others all around us. I find that no one cares about the science. Sexual addiction is also a mental health disorder. I’ve never shared this publicly but that was also my reality. It became me and one the surface it just looked like promiscuity.
She is just fast, she is a whore, no morals, she this she that… Do you see why I strongly believe that there is always an evolution of chronic illness, addiction, disease, and or disorder? Medical conditions rarely pop up overnight. However, we must be willing to find and address the root cause where they start. But again it is easier to blame the victim and focus on the stigmas… I talk more about the types of stigmas in this video… Press play
Why the ??♀️ hell would I share all of that?
Folks might be giving me the ? side eye or asking? why I put myself and my business out there⁉️ My answer is this (and I literally told myself before the video,) “self if this video helps at least one person? see there is hope on the other side of mental illness it will be worth being vulnerable.”
Within an hour of that live video, I connected with a completed stranger. Someone I was not friends with and we had 0 zero mutual friends. The image below is of her words to me after she watched the above live video.
Some might say well you cant change the past. Trust me, I know I tried that You can, however, do your best to minimize the negative impact your past has on your future if you want to function and contribute to the world you live in. Especially if you have a spouse and or children. Therefore when I end my videos by saying “reward yourself every day by making healthy lifestyle choices” I mean it
I am not beating myself up about my past.
I am rewarding myself every day for how far I have come.
I do so with my healthy choices.
Healing is ? Not One Size Fits All, but This Helps Most
I am healing through meditation, earthing/ grounding, yoga, clean eating/ drinking, and supplements. The easiest and probably most effective thing I do is take supplements. Sounds simple right? Well, it is and it isn’t. Our bodies are very complex and have little communities that either harm or help us. I have done extensive research on chemical imbalance and the gut-brain connection. But all you have to do is google Gut Brain connection and read some peer-reviewed articles, journal or studies.
Stress is a normal part of life but constant, uncontrollable worry and anxiety do not have to be. To help my good gut bacteria thrive and function at optimal/beneficial levels and send positive messages to my brain I regularly take two kinds of probiotic. the Vital Biome during the day and the Probio5 at night. You can order and read more by clicking each product name. Vital Biome and Probio5 are not a once a month fix when my stress is through the roof. I take them every day… It’s not a quick fix either I use them as a means of being proactive.
Mental Health Awareness ?Month is Over.
The month of May is done and so is this long blog. But I hope we keep the conversation going. I never thought I would be sharing so much of me when started my natural health journey because I did it for myself. I even called my research mesearch. Now as a natural health consultant I help others find hope, health, and happiness… and yes mental health is one of those things and we need to stop the stigmatizing and speak up and out about.
I’m a little all over the place as a ?? wife, homeschool ???mom, natural ?health consultant and future ?student…
but I would love? for you to follow? RARE by Roselyne ? on
Instagram for daily inspirational ?quotes and ?pictures.